I have been thinking lately about the last 15 years of my life. I can honestly say I've made some mistakes and there have been plenty of good times too.
Would I change anything you ask? I have concluded the answer is No. The answer is no because I would not be where I am today if I had not learned my lessons, dealt with the pain and let God work on me.
I have learned in the last ten years how much faking I was doing, both to myself and others. I faked a great marriage, I faked having "it all together", I even faked a great financial situation. I was even working hard to get God to love me more. I say all that to say, I had to "fake" it and pretend to have it all so it could fall down around me. I needed to get to the real me, the real situations and the real problems. I had to face things for what they were, not what I wanted them to be - big difference.
For all of you that watched me in the last 10 years (at least from 2004 to 2014), that know me well, I want to apologize to you for all the fakeness. I was having trouble being real with myself much less real with other people. You didn't ask for that fakeness and you didn't deserve it. Thank you for your friendship anyway and for forgiving me!
Now don't get me wrong, like I said before there were good and happy times in those years too. I met awesome friends, got to do some fun things and loved someone more than anyone else in this whole world - all good gifts from God! The point I am making is it took the fascade to fall to get me to see what I needed to see about myself and some of the things I had done and allowed in my life. I hope that makes sense.
I want to encourage all of you to put aside pretending, put aside fake. Be real, be honest. Don't let too much time slip away. Let God do His work in you. Never regret anything you have been through, there is always a lesson to be learned.
I wouldn't change a thing because God still has a plan and it is all good! And He still has a plan for you too!
Until next time,