God Restores, People Pick and Choose
Hello everyone! The title for this blog came to me about 4 days ago but I wanted some time think about it before writing.
I am here to tell you God can restore anything, and I do mean anything. The problem is not God, it is us. We are the ones who pick and choose what we do and don't want restored in our lives. Allow me to give you a very personal example.
I was married to a man for 3 years who struggled with mental illness. As a result of his mental illness and growing up in an abusive home, he was also abusive. He was a brilliant actor. To the outside world, he had everything together and he was a loving husband - only I knew the truth. Although I loved him and wanted him to be healed and restored so our marriage could be restored, he chose victim mentality and his image over restoration. He picked himself over us. God was fully willing and able to help and restore him but he didn't choose God, he chose himself. I was angry at him for a long time until I realized why he chose himself. He chose himself because he didn't believe he could do any better. He chose himself because it had always managed to work before. This time it did not work and he took his own life. My husband was a Christian and I believe, despite his choice and his behavior, he went to be with Jesus. How different it could have been if he'd chosen to let Jesus restore him - how different ours lives could have been too.
I am no longer angry at him but sometimes it does make me sad. My hope is that I know he is with Jesus and he is now fully restored. He does not remember what he did or why. He only know the joy he could not find here on earth.
In our situation, God was not the problem, my late husband was the problem. He, like so many, pick and choose what they want God to restore because they do not believe he can restore them or they do not know they can do better. I also believe there are times they simply don't know how to ask for help.
After my late husband died, God had to do a lot of restoring in me. I also had to realize I am not responsible for other people's actions or choices. He is continuing to restore and heal my heart so I can be a whole person for my next lifelong relationship that I believe He will bring to me. Had I decided to pick and choose what I thought God could and could not restore, where would I be? I can only imagine but I don't believe it would be writing this to you nor would I have ever published my book and started something new in my life. To be honest with you, I would probably be drowning my sorrows in alcohol and chasing meaningless relationships if I had chosen my way over God's way.
If you are reading this blog right now and you don't think God can restore your situation or relationship, no matter what you have or have not done, I ask you to look again. I ask you to believe and walk out on that vulnerable limb and be honest with yourself and with God. He is not afraid of you, He is not afraid of what you have or have not done. He is not angry with you. He will not hold you responsible for other people's actions or choices so don't hold yourself responsible. He loves you and wants to help and restore you life. Do not run away from Him, run toward Him!
Run toward the only One who can take your pain and turn it into something beautiful. He has done and is doing that for me and He will do it for you too!