A New Transition: An Aging Parent and Parkinson's

Hello everyone! I moved last month and life has transitioned once again. I wanted to share a few thoughts with you now that life is settling down. I am caring for my mother who is both aging and dealing with Parkinson's. Watching her not only age but deal with this disease has been both hard and inspiring - hard because she is not who she once was and inspiring because she won't give up trying to get better. She is still a go getter!

The other day I was putting together a digital album of photos of her and me, her by herself, her with dad, and her with the grandkids. I felt it was time, and I cried the whole time. Nothing prepares you for old age or the effects of Parkinson's on a loved one and yourself. Nothing prepared my mom for this health issue either and how it would change her mentally and physically. The only thing that has not changed is her faith and her determination to not let this beat her.

Some days for her (and us) are easier than others. She gets anxious and forgetful at times.  She can easily fixate when she is anxious. Patience is a must, and it is difficult at the same time especially when you have to repeat yourself for the 3rd, 4th, or 5th time. What makes this even more difficult for my mom is she is fully aware of these issues. She knows her mond has changed. She admitted to me that she is afraid and that she has been afraid a long time - most of her life in fact. I can't speak to whether fear plays a role in the development of Parkinson's or other cognitive deficits but I can say it certainly does not help a person.

Are there days I wish things were different for her and us? Yes! Have a cried about this more than once? Yes. I believe the time has come to grieve who she was and accept who she is now. I feel helpless to fix this problem. I don't want to fix it to be honest. I can't change it. She can't change it. We have zero control over this issue. This season is about trust - trust in the Father. This season is a season of thankfulness as well, even for the little things.

Today, I am thankful she can still laugh and joke. She has not let go of her joy. I am thankful she still knows who we are and enjoys our company. I am thankful she still loves her pretty jewlery and clothing. I am thamkful she loves the fall leaves and spring flowers. I am thankful she and dad love each other. I am thankful that she is thankful for my help. I am thankful for each day she is with us. 

I don't know what the next few years will bring for her or our family, but I know Who holds us all. I choose to be thankful.  I choose trust. I choose joy.

One day at a time,

Elizabeth