As I talked about in my book, silence is never good when it is hiding something evil. In fact silence can kill relationships, love, and yes, it can literally kill you in the wrong situation.
I got a call from a friend of mine yesterday and she voiced that she was being abused. I think it helped her just to say it, to acknowledge it, to give it a name and to talk to someone about it. It was like she had an epiphany of her situation. She was being abused both emotionally and now physically yet she was holding on because she loved the person and was married to him. I did the same with my late husband Jeff. Does this sound familiar to you? Are you in a similar situation?
Ladies and gentlemen, I am hear to tell you, you don't have to put up with abuse of any kind. Abuse is not love, it is control! You can break the silence and the cycle. Speak up and speak out! You are not responsible for the behavior of your abuser. Take care of yourself and your children if you have them. Get out of the situation and find a safe place. Get counceling as I did and as my friend is doing. I will also tell you that your abuser may or may not be willing to change. Again, you are not responsble for whether he or she changes or not, you are only responsible for yourself.
When we acknowledge evil that we have remained silent about, we not only give it a name, we shine light into dark places. The dark can't escape the light nor can it hide from it. Once an evil or injustice is exposed, it will have a hard time hiding itself again. My late husband had a hard time convincing others he was not in the wrong, too much light had been shined into a dark place. I am sad he did not choose to change but I was never responsible for changing him as my friend is not responsible for changing her husband.
My prayer for her and any of you that are in a similar situation is that you will find a safe place. You will talk to someone you trust and you will allow God to begin to heal you. I also pray for abusers, that they will come to know how much God loves them and that they to can change and break the cycle of violence and hurt in their own lives.
While people live, they can change. However, we are only individually responsible for ourselves, not others. To the abuser I say, you can change! To the one being abused I say, you can have a better life, you are valuable. Please get out and get help! And to both of you I say, God loves you both and wants to heal you both!
Breaking the silence,
If you want to know more about my story please see my book The Road Less Traveled, A Story of Love, Hope, Pain and Everything In Between. You can find it on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iTunes, Kobo.com, the Kobo app, Books a Million (BAM) and Audible.com. In Canada you can find it at McNally Robinson Books and Russell Book and !ndigo.