I want to shout today's blog title from the rooftops or from Mount Everest for that matter!
Fakeness in our relationships or in our character is not going to work out very well. It won't work for us and it won't work for other people. **Trust me, I lived with a very fake man for 3 years. Eventually, he could no longer hide his character nor the issues that plagued his heart. I too was fake during that time. I pretended all was well when it was not. I gave a fake smile to the world. I even faked that our finances were doing well when the exact opposite was true! He and I were both good at the fake smiles. In many ways, we were both trying to survive, for very different reasons. Fakeness just seemed easier. I also believe we were under the impression if we "acted" this way long enough, things would get better. That is a lie; you can't "act" or fake your way out of relationship problems.
I look back now and realize that so much could have been resolved if we had taken off the masks and set aside our fakeness. There were so many complicated things that could have been simplified, not to mention the lies could have stopped. Lying gets old and tiring and a lot of lying goes into fakeness. Think about how much energy you are using up lying and being fake - energy that could be used to better your relationship, not rip it apart.
Why are we fake? Fear, the need to survive, distrust, selfishness, lying is easier; the list goes on. I know many of these things were influencing my fakeness in my marriage at the time. I know they influenced my late husband as well.
I pen this article to tell you that fakeness in your relationships will cost you, perhaps a price you don't want to pay. Fakeness cost me the person I was supposed to love for a lifetime; not because I did not want to work on our marriage, but because he found it easier to be fake then get the help he needed to heal. He paid the ultimate price with his life because of fear. I don't want any of you to walk down that path.
I want to encourage everyone reading this blog to stop the fakeness!! Get real so you can get healed! Get real so you can deal with the issues that plague you. Lying, hiding, secrets and fake smiles won't help or heal you; they will only hurt and destroy you. God sees through our fakeness anyway so the only person we fool is ouselves. He not only sees our fakeness and our real self, He knows what to do to help us. In other words, there is a way out! You aren't bound to continue in fakeness, unless you want to. Choose to be free from fake!
Be real. Be genuine. Be humble. Be honest. Watch what God does with these things. You will not be disappointed!
Stopping the fakeness,
**If you would like to know more of my story, see my book The Road Less Traveled: A Story of Love, Pain, Hope and Everything In-Between. My book is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, iTunes and Audible.com